Who thinks these things up anyway?

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Columnist Ceil Abbott

While deciding what I wanted to write about in this week’s column, I was surfing the Internet and accidently logged onto a website dedicated to letting us know what we are supposed to observe on the various days of the year.

The website called holidayinsights.com basically lists the subjects that one is supposed to celebrate on each day of the year.

For instance, according to this website in addition to New Year’s Day and Martin Luther King Day, there are a plethora of lesser known holidays in January.

Take for instance Jan. 2 is called “National Run It Up the Flagpole and See If Anyone Salutes Day.”

And, according to this website, that doesn’t mean it is a day when we’re supposed to fly the flag. Instead the designation refers to a commonly used phrase in the advertising industry where running something up the flagpole to see if anybody salutes means to try out a new idea in front of your coworkers to get their reaction.

As if that isn’t a bizarre enough reason for celebrating, the next day, Jan. 4, is “Fruit Cake Toss Day.”

Yeah, that means exactly what it sounds like – a day set aside to toss out all that disgusting fruitcake have leftover from the holidays.

Of course, some of the days aren’t quite as silly as the first two I listed.

There is Jan 6 “National Cuddle Up Day.” This is a day set aside to escape the cold winds of winter by cuddling up to someone you love.

And Jan. 8 is “National Male Watching Day.” A special day set aside to give us girls a chance to get even with the guys for all the times we’ve had to put up with wolf whistles, leers and catcalls by enjoying a little eye candy ourselves.

Still, on the other hand, there are some really weird reasons for celebrating certain days.

Take for instance, Jan. 14 “Dress Up your Pet Day.” That’s right your supposed to set aside that day is supposedly as a time for folks to humiliate their cats, dogs or hamsters by forcing them to don some “frou-frou” outfit that no animal in its right mind would be caught dead in.

There’s Jan. 17, a day set aside specifically for breaking all those New Year’s resolutions you made. Of course if you’ve already kept a resolution a whole two weeks you are way ahead of the game anyway.

Then there’s Jan. 21, “National Hugging Day” and Jan. 23, (I kid you not) “National Measure your Feet Day.”

Of course there are some “holidays” that have a lot of merit like Jan. 23 “National Beer Can Appreciation Day” or Jan. 27, “National Chocolate Cake Day.” Now those are holidays I can get firmly behind.

Still I must ask who comes up with these ideas? And how on earth would one go about getting Jan. 11 designated “National Step in a Puddle and Splash Your Friend Day.” For heaven’s sake, why would anyone want to in the first place?

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